Can I Have Sex Now?

A 20-year-old man from a country in West Africa has been writing through GMO (Global Media Outreach). He is growing in the Lord, studying his Bible and involved in his church.

He recently wrote that he would like to have a sexual experience with a woman. “How can I abstain from sexual immoralities, while I am feeling the urge every second. Even though I have never had sex with anyone before, yet I’m feeling I’d like to do it now.  Is it a sin to have sex now?”

I responded, “Dear B, Your sexual desires are normal. But God created sex only for marriage between a husband and wife. It is difficult to wait, but this is God’s design and His plan for you. Obedience is not easy, but God rewards us when we obey Him.

Meanwhile, you must avoid anything that will lead you into temptation. Do not watch porn. Do not hang out with anyone who may tempt you to sin.

Here are some helpful websites:                                                                                                                 

Dear Father in Heaven,  You know B’s struggles. You know his heart yearns to serve You and obey You always. Please give him Your patience and endurance. Fill him with Your Holy Spirit so he will have Your peace, Your joy, and the self-control he needs at all times. I pray in the strong name of Jesus, our only hope,  Amen.

  • It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality.  1 Thessalonians 4:3
  • Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.    Psalm 27:14
  • Obey me, and I will be your God and you will be my people. Walk in all the ways I command you, that it may go well with you.   Jeremiah 7:23
  • But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars—they will be consigned to the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death.”    Revelation 21:8
  • For more information on Global Media Outreach:
  • SONG:  THESE INWARD TRIALSWords by John Newton, circa 1779; Music by Kathleen


[This life is temporary. This life is short.  When this life is over, our bodies will die and become empty shells, but our souls will continue to live forever.  Where will the “real you” live?  Will you live for all eternity separated from God?  Or will you spend eternity in the presence of God in heaven?   Learn more so you can make your most important decision:  and

[To leave a comment or prayer request, simply click on the TITLE of this post and scroll to the bottom.]

About Kathleen

God delights in working through His people as they submit to Him. Jesus said to go into all the world and preach the good news to everyone (Mark 16:15). No matter where we live on this planet, people are separated from God because of sin. We ALL need a Savior, and there’s only ONE. It brings me great joy to share Christ with the lost and lonely. Over the years I’ve learned a great deal while facilitating Bible studies. I’ve found myself on college and university campuses, the beach, the streets, the hospital, the jail and the juvenile facility for incarcerated teens sharing God’s message of love. I also serve as an online missionary with Global Media Outreach. I’ve seen countless lives transformed when people turn away from sin and turn to Jesus. The changes God makes are real and lasting. These are some of my experiences. NOTE: My stories have been altered, removing any and all identifying factors. This includes names and other particulars in order to protect confidentiality and anonymity.
This entry was posted in COLLEGE CAMPUS, DOCTRINE, GLOBAL MEDIA OUTREACH, Love & Romance, PEOPLE, RAISING KIDS and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Can I Have Sex Now?

  1. Stuart says:

    Good advice for this young man, great references and powerful verses.

    So thankful for your involvement with the youth and young adults.

  2. Kathleen says:

    Dear Stuart,
    I appreciate the encouragement. Thanks for stopping by.

  3. Frank K says:

    Thanks for sharing this, Kathleen. This is such a difficult area for youths today. They are bombarded with messages and images all day long that appeal to their sexual desires. As you stated to the young man, “Obedience is not easy….” But sexual purity is possible through Christ.

    • Kathleen says:

      Yes Frank, it IS a difficult subject today. The message of purity until marriage has become very unpopular in recent years. Yet, we know God’s ways are best.

  4. Kathleen says:

    Thank you, Katt. God has given us His guidelines. He rewards those who are obedient.

  5. S Coker says:

    I know a 25-year-old young lady who doesn’t think the Bible forbids sex without marriage if she and her boyfriend remain faithful. I had to dig for this one. I brought up fornication, but she still wondered aloud, “Does the Bible really teach that we have to literally go through the marriage process, that we have to go through the act? Isn’t it enough that we stay with each other?” Then I found an excellent article, which speaks of the importance of a covenant relationship. This is an excellent article for those who just aren’t getting it. I’m baffled at so many Christians who don’t see the importance of marrying a Christian, and then so many others now just don’t see the importance of “going through the motions” of “making it official.” Don’t get me started about why it’s important to marry a committed Christian.

    • Kathleen says:

      Thank you for your comments and also your excellent link.
      I am not baffled at so many Christians who make questionable choices. Our society has drifted so far from the teachings of Scripture, that few people know right from wrong.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.