Don’t Marry Him!

I received a letter from Lissa, the 17-year-old daughter of a long-time friend.  Lissa loves the Lord Jesus and was seeking Christian advice.  She said she considers me a “sister” because we both are Christians.  She then explained that she had an 18-year-old boyfriend and wanted me to convince her parents that even though they were young, marrying him was the right thing to do.

She said, “He’s a Christian, but he does have a little anger problem.  Sometimes he hits me, but he needs me and I know I can help him.”

I wrote back:  “Dear Lissa, I’m glad you consider me a ‘sister’ because we are sisters in the Lord and sometimes that is closer than a blood relationship.  I’m glad you have a special friend and I’m pleased he knows the Lord.  But I want you to heed your big sister’s advice:

“The way Sam treats you now is the best he’ll ever treat you.  If he sometimes hits you now, he will hit you more after your marriage.

“Don’t marry him until you are confident he has grown more mature than you, in the things of the Lord.  The Bible tells us the husband is to be the spiritual leader in the home.  The wife is called to be submissive to her husband.  However, the husband is to love her AS Christ loved the church.  That’s a lot of love!  Read Ephesians 5:22-33.

“Sam’s most important purpose as a husband is to guide you in spiritual things so that someday he can present you to Christ holy and blameless.  In a sense, you are to be the follower and Sam the leader.

“Your parents love you and they can see the pitfalls ahead.  That is why God has given the commandment to honor your father and mother.  And again, ‘obey your parents.'”

As you may imagine, Lissa did not appreciate my letter, but she did receive my advice.
She thanked me years later when she married her Bible study leader.  Indeed, HE was God’s choice!

  •  Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.   Ephesians 6:1
  •  Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.  Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.             Ephesians 5:22-27
  • I LOVE THE LORDBy Kathleen
This life is temporary.  This life is short.  When this life is over, our bodies will die and become empty shells, but our souls will continue to live forever.  Where will the “real you” live?  Will you live for all eternity separated from God?  Or will you spend eternity in the presence of God in heaven?   Learn more so you can make your most important decision:

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About Kathleen

God delights in working through His people as they submit to Him. Jesus said to go into all the world and preach the good news to everyone (Mark 16:15). No matter where we live on this planet, people are separated from God because of sin. We ALL need a Savior, and there’s only ONE. It brings me great joy to share Christ with the lost and lonely. Over the years I’ve learned a great deal while facilitating Bible studies. I’ve found myself on college and university campuses, the beach, the streets, the hospital, the jail and the juvenile facility for incarcerated teens sharing God’s message of love. I also serve as an online missionary with Global Media Outreach. I’ve seen countless lives transformed when people turn away from sin and turn to Jesus. The changes God makes are real and lasting. These are some of my experiences. NOTE: My stories have been altered, removing any and all identifying factors. This includes names and other particulars in order to protect confidentiality and anonymity.
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16 Responses to Don’t Marry Him!

  1. Helene says:

    Your advice was based on the Word. Good advice, good outcome.

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