Why Stay in an Unhappy Marriage?

Recently I overheard a Christian man make this appalling statement:  “Why would anyone stay in an unhappy marriage? Life is short! Get a divorce and move on!”

How could a follower of Jesus say such a thing?  I listened from a distance, but it started me thinking.   Why? Why?  I know why!

If we are truly Christ-followers who have been born again, then we do the right thing, that’s why!  Yes, life is short!  That’s why it’s important that we stay in our marriage. We work on it. We pray. We set an example for our children. We don’t run from our problems, but we trust God. We work on becoming a better wife or husband and we love more and more.

Marriage vows were made. Vows are not to be broken. Perhaps your spouse needs the Lord. Leaving will not lead him/her closer to God, but will even distance him/her further.

Life is a test.  I want to pass this test.  Happiness is a choice.  Moreover, our goal in life is not to be happy, but to become holy.  God never promised us happiness. What He did promise us in John 16:33 was trouble!  Our purpose in life is to know God, to serve God and to love God.

When we surrender our lives to Jesus Christ we receive the Holy Spirit and all the fruit of the Spirit. This includes love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).  All Christians receive all the fruit of the Holy Spirit, not just some of it.  We simply need to exercise that fruit.

Does the fruit of the Spirit guarantee us happiness?  Happiness is a result of something that happens.  The Spirit promises us joy.  Joy is a quality that abides within and keeps us living above our circumstances. Joy is better.

  • Wait!  Are you being physically abused?  In the USA call the National Domestic Violence Hotline:  1-800-799-SAFE (7233), or 1-800-787-3224 (TTY for deaf, hard of hearing).
  • Jesus said,  “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”   John 16:33
  • When a man makes a vow to the LORD or takes an oath to obligate himself by a pledge, he must not break his word but must do everything he said.    Numbers 30:2, Matthew 5:33
  • For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise, your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.   1 Corinthians 7:14


[This life is temporary. This life is short.  When this life is over, our bodies will die and become empty shells, but our souls will continue to live forever.  Where will the “real you” live?  Will you live for all eternity separated from God?  Or will you spend eternity in the presence of God in heaven?   Learn more so you can make your most important decision:   http://www.godlife.com/gospel/  and  http://www.godlife.com/en/about-christianity

About Kathleen

God delights in working through His people as they submit to Him. Jesus said to go into all the world and preach the good news to everyone (Mark 16:15). No matter where we live on this planet, people are separated from God because of sin. We ALL need a Savior, and there’s only ONE. It brings me great joy to share Christ with the lost and lonely. Over the years I’ve learned a great deal while facilitating Bible studies. I’ve found myself on college and university campuses, the beach, the streets, the hospital, the jail and the juvenile facility for incarcerated teens sharing God’s message of love. I also serve as an online missionary with Global Media Outreach. I’ve seen countless lives transformed when people turn away from sin and turn to Jesus. The changes God makes are real and lasting. These are some of my experiences. NOTE: My stories have been altered, removing any and all identifying factors. This includes names and other particulars in order to protect confidentiality and anonymity.
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2 Responses to Why Stay in an Unhappy Marriage?

  1. Liana says:

    Another powerful thought provoking post Kathleen …

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